Saturday, June 28, 2008

More!

Chasing after Meow Meow.
OMG, good kitty!!!!! I turned around and she picked the poor thing up and walked with him. We did supervise!!!! He was very calm.
Baba carrying Ping carrying kitty to put on the bench!

Baba making fishies and school busses for Miss Pingster! Happy Anniversary honey. Ping, you are the most wonderful gift.

A few more....

Baba and I both wore PINK today!!!! Mama's new couches are in the background. Messy background photo, sorry.
Two peas in a pod.
In the gardens at lunch. So pretty.
Found a very sweet black pussy cat and had to sit and pet meow meow.
Look Mama, I am petty the kitty.

Some recent pics!

A woman from Freecycle came and got a box spring and mattress. Baba helped tie the box spring onto the top of her van. Ping watched. This is what she did with painters tape shortly after. She literally tied the tap to the car and knotted it. We were amazed.
I often wonder why there aren't enough hours in the day. Well, when you are sleeping, things just can't get done now, right?
Can you say comatose????
Ping played outside all day. Gave her a bath and threw the dress on her before going out to dinner with our friends Meri, Joe and Lucas. This dress was given by Ayi Jenn and Ping LOVES to twirl with it. The shoes are courtesy of Ayi Karen!
Hanging with our Gatorade!!!!

5 Years of Wedded Bliss!!!!

We were married 5 years ago today. It's so hard to believe it's been 5 years!!!!! It's been 19 since we started dating! It's been 5 years since we have pursued a family and thank goodness, our Ping is now here!!!!

I wanted to do a little something for our day given the last few weeks. So I made reservations for lunch at a place in New Hampshire. We had lunch at 4pm and then came home. Ping and I passed out the last 20 minutes or so of the ride, so when Bill pulled in to the driveway, I told him I was staying in the car with Ping! We slept for a short time and then the car got too muggy for us. We came in just in time for the tones to go off. Bill is at a motorcycle accident right now and I am not sure when he will be home. So we did a little something for the day. No gifts and only a card from me. It wasn't intentional, but the cats have been our priority for 3 weeks.

I miss my Lily. It was nice to get out for awhile today to keep our minds busy! Ping was great. She got a lot of compliments from staff and other diners as to how well behaved she was. We were very proud of her. We often are.

Hope you are all well.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

My Sweetest Baby, We Will Miss You!!!!!!


We got a call from our neighbor at 7:45 am today. Her oldest daughter saw a cat on the side of the road on her way to work. She called her mom to tell her and her mom called us. Bill and I threw clothes on and our neighbor came to get us. Her youngest daughter watched Ping and we drove down the street. It was Lily. She had been hit. I was very afraid this would happen as I saw her two days ago and she was running scared. I have been so concerned that she would get scared and not look where she was going. I have been driving all around every day, just to make sure.

So we picked Lily up, wrapped her in a towel, wrote a card to her, put her favorite toy between her paws and buried her on our property.

I have been hysterically crying since. I wish I wasn't. I wish I could move on so easily as others do when they have lost a pet. I love them much, much too deep. They are family to me. I would do anything for them. She didn't deserve this fate. She wasn't even 4 years old. We have indoor kitties so this will never happen to them. I hope that if there is truly such a place called heaven, she is there with my mom and dad.

I truly feel like this is our fault. We didn't protect her. We are the ones that agreed to love and protect her. We failed miserably. I don't really get this thing called life. Why has so much been taken from so many? Some people seem to truly drift through life without much heartache while others have to face it continuously. I really don't get it.

Now is not a time to ponder that stuff. It is a time to miss our baby and we will forever. We love you sweetie. I hope you are prancing around and loving life.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Up Ze Arse!

My sweetest Ping has been a tad whiny and smothering the last two days! That is unless the king known as Baba walks in to the house. She is so sweet and loving and kissy and huggy and then boom, Mama turns into the ordinary boring Cinderella with an ill fitting sneaker! Drives me mad. She is still hanging on me and climbing up to get behind me on the chair. I can usually tolerate it and then she pulls my hair in the process and I just want to scream. I then try to remember that there are millions of people in this world who would give their life to have a child hang on them. They may still be in the process of trying to have children or they may be losing or have lost a child to an illness or accident. So I continue to let her hang on me. This is what being a parent is all about.

I think I am getting this parenting thing down a little bit. I still struggle and most definitely always will, but it is getting better. We have truly lucked out with Ping. If she wasn't such a delight, I may have holed myself up in my house with the shades down. However, she is a fairly easy child. She is so friendly and that is wonderful. If she was shy and clingy, it would certainly be harder. She is quite the social butterfly!!!!!

I saw Lily today for the first time in a long time. She was out during the day. I was shocked!!!!! She was in the back of the house. She spotted me and fled. I have never seen a cat run like that. It scared me as it was across the street:( A car came up the street 2 minutes later. I saw her run up a hill, to one side and then to another side. Then she disappeared out of site. I can only hope she calmed herself down!!!!! I worry about her. I really hope we are able to bring her back in. It hurt my feelings that she dashed from me like she did. If anything, she was the one that really seemed to love me. I know it's cause she is feral. That is what my head says, but my heart is different. Please continue to think good thoughts for us. Thanks!!!!!

Mama out.

Saturday, June 21, 2008

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sophie is now in:)))))) She is mad, I am sure. She is hiding under a couch. Hopefully she will come out soon.

I suggested getting a baby monitor. We have had it for a few days. Bill thought I had lost my marbles. We discovered it wasn't going to go under the stairs because it needed to be plugged in. So I suggested we put it in the garage tonight. So we heard someone eating. It was not Sophie. It was another cat. However, he thinks the second time we heard something that it was Lily, but the garage door bounced back up because we think she was too close to the edge. Bill decided to sit in the garage and when Sophie came in, he hit the garage door opener and bam, we got her:)))))) Now if we could get Lily to come around and fall for it, we would be golden!!!!!!

I wanted to put it on here, so people would know asap!!!!!!

Thanks and prayers for Lily!!!!!

Thursday, June 19, 2008

My Stupid Stomach!!!!!

I am so sick of it. I haven't been bugged by it for a few weeks, but today after eating some pretzels, it reared it's ugly head!!!! Why would pretzels bug it. So I dealt with the pain. Somewhere around 7 though, I got one of those attacks. I was nervous as I was alone with Ping. I was sweating badly and running to the bathroom and then sitting on the couch funny, just to catch my breath. It passed very quickly. I was so grateful. I tried a few Saltines and in the middle of reaching for it, Ping starts in with the "Mama, I want a cracker." Give me a break kid! I am about to meet my maker!!!! You want a freaking cracker that may mean the difference between me living and dying? I took one and handed the rest to her. I didn't care that she was walking all over the house with them. That was the least of my worries. She knew something was wrong though because as I was on the couch dying, she was being sweet and rubbing my arm and shoulder saying "Mama." She knew. She picks up on stuff like that. It amazes me. Maybe I turned gray, who knows. However, she knew. She would be the kind to call 911 for me, but we haven't gotten there yet. Good thing cause she would call now just to say hello:)

The house is a disaster!!!!! We are in the middle of moving stuff, adding new things and getting rid of stuff. The whole house is scary and should be blown to bits!!!!!!

I want to paint the living room. Bill said "go to it hon." Now that isn't what I wanted to hear lovey dovey!!!!!! PAINT dammit!!!!

I should head off to bed. If I am lucky, I will wake up to a semi dry child. Bill put a SWIM diaper on Miss Ping last night. What was he thinking? Oh yeah, he wasn't!!!!!! She smelled funny to me this morning. I kept picking up on this odd smell. She was soaked from belly button to her feet with pee. She got all of the bedding too. Nice, eh? Guess who is washing the bedding?????? There are consequences to your actions my love!!!!!

It's been a really tough week for my friends. Donna lost her father in law tonight:( 2 firefighter wives lost a parent this week too. They were all in their 80s, so while it's not tragic, it is very sad for them.

So off to bed. Hope you and your family is well.

Mama out.

Sofaria!!!!! Really it's Sophie, but this is what I call her!

I have it good here, so why am I wandering around the yard as Jill types???????

A Few Pictures

At the playground.
My sweet Lily. I miss you.
Off to our Preschool opening.

Not the most flattering photo. She loves paper towels.

New Transportation Vehicle For Ping!!!!!




Mama, gas is so expensive now. I thought I would let you use my car:)

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Long Day

I am on double duty today. Bill had to work and then go to school. So my dearest Ping has been up my _________ for hours now! I look at the alternative and it stinks, so I rather have her under my foot 24/7 than not. It makes for a long day though. Come home BABA!!!!!!!!

Ping's newest thing is sharing my computer chair. Makes life a tad uncomfortable. It's difficult to type and my back bugs me when she sits with me. She likes to sit behind me. She is crawling back up here now! It's really cute when she throws her arms around me and says "hi mama." It's still not comfy though!

There isn't much to share tonight. There have been no sightings today:( It was raining here awhile ago, so maybe that is keeping them in and safe? We have caught the local skunk 3 times and also a black and white cat. However, not our girls. I am trying not to lose hope, but damn it is so hard. It is so unsettling not knowing if they are okay or not. I guess that is preferable to knowing that they are NOT okay!!!

We were going to go away for a few days next week, but I have decided to cancel. I am not in the mood to be anywhere but home. It's more important to be here. There is one Sophie and one Lily. The other stuff will be there next week and next year. We were going for our 5th anniversary next Saturday. We will go another time. Bill has been out of work some with his pneumonia too, so he might as well work and take some time off in the future. I was looking forward to it though!!!!

It's hard to share the info on the cats with people. Even here. A lot of people don't get it. They never loved an animal or they never loved an animal like a family member. Some people get pets for their "kids" but don't care about the animal really. Some people get pets as they are disposable to them. Not here. When we take on a pet, we take it on for life. We do whatever we can to make them happy and we love them for life. That is why missing the girls is with me daily. I will not be getting over it tomorrow. I may never get over it. Time heals, but I would prefer that they return here pissed off and then I can move on to a better place:)

I hope my blog hasn't become boring. I know I haven't had any major Ping stories to share. That is a good thing for me:) That means I am getting used to her and her to me. More importantly, she is getting used to the routine and my wrath. LOL. Honestly though, she hasn't done anything really out of control lately. Mind you, now that I have put that out there, she will.

If she is going to sit behind me, why can't she at least massage my shoulders???? I have asked repeatedly and she just stares at me with those big brown eyes!!!!! Well I guess I will have to continue to work with her on that.

Gotta run and get some stuff done!

Mama Out.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Limited Sightings

I saw Sophie tonight. I was thrilled. I didn't see her all day, but I have the last two days. I still have not seen Lily. It makes me think the worst:( I am just not the same without my two family members!!!!!!

I am having a hard time with life right now. I find it awfully depressing. There has been a lot of death around me lately. It's not affecting me right now, but it is affecting others. A firefighters wife just lost her dad. He was elderly and hadn't been feeling well. My friend Donna's father in law is in tough shape and it won't be much longer before he passes. Someone at my old work place just died of cancer. Another person at my old work place is very ill with cancer and she is my age. What is this all about? I feel like life is this sick obstacle course that you run through and if you are lucky, you don't get hit with cancer or an awful accident. Then you get to make it to your ripe old age and die anyway!!!!!! Then you go into the ground and poof, you are done existing! Bill says that you then get to live a long life in heaven. Really? Are you sure? Is there a heaven? Is there another place? I would love to believe it, but is this place made up because we can't face the truth? The truth is we go into the ground and 2 generations later, you don't see a soul at your grave site? No flowers? No tears?

Why was my dad taken at 60 and my mom at 70? Why are my cats missing? Why did I have infertility? Why am I overweight? If you say it's cause I eat too much, I will kill you so shut it:) I feel like I have been given my lot. Why is this all happening? Why do some people seem to escape it and seem like they have a charmed life? There are always others who have had it worse than I. I get that. My friends have heard me say a lot of what I am saying here. I just don't get it. I want some answers and dammit, now would be nice!!!! Bring home my cats for Pete's sake. Let me and my husband and Ping and the 4 cats live in peace for awhile, please.

I worry now that we have Ping, that something disastrous will happen to her or us. After all, happiness is snatched away quite often. Does anyone feel this way???? Bill thinks he should own a Super B since life is so fleeting. So having a serious discussion with him is pointless as you can see. However, he does know how to use his charms. NO SUPER B BABY!!!!!!!

Maybe it's just that I miss the girls, haven't seen one in particular and that bugs me. All that plus a lot of people passing away or quite ill. Maybe it's just all too fresh or much right now. I really don't know. I just wish someone would stop shaking the freaking snow globe and let the snow sit still for awhile! PLEASE!!!!!

Sorry to be so melodramatic. I don't mean to be a downer. I just use this blog to think out loud!!!! I am so grateful for the wonderful friends I have and am making now that I am home with my Pingster. I am grateful my husband is employed and we have a decent but dirty roof over our heads. I am grateful we have gas prices as high as they can be! LOL. Long live the gas tycoons!!!!! I really am grateful for what I have, but I want to walk into a closet with everyone I love, sit down, shut off the light and stop life.

Mama Out!

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Lucky Man!!!!!!

I made a lot of calls today to find out more about how to get two cats inside. I spoke to a nice woman in the South. She felt we were doing all that we could be doing. I was grateful for that.

I called the local Animal Control Officer just to see about purchasing some equipment locally. Instead of the gentleman calling me back, he stopped by. I thought that was so very thoughtful of him. NOT. He walked up to me on the porch and I sweetly greeted him, introduced myself and shook his hand. He said "you called?" Why yes I did and here is why, I went on to explain. He went on to say "you know you have to bait the traps you have here." Really asshole? I just freaking told you that we were in the process of changing things up and we have yet to move the cages and bait them again. Listen up old man. He went on to say "why are you going through all this trouble? Just get yourself some new cats?" WHAT? Are you fucking kidding me? Did you just stop by my house and say this? I wanted to tell the man that he was lucky I didn't rip his balls off right then and there! I told him that I loved the ones I had and was just hoping for a little advice and since it looked like we were doing things correctly, thanks and get lost. I was ready to trap his nads in the GOD DAMN CAGE! So he walked off and reminded me to bait the cage. Thanks you useless piece of shit!

So my post is far from sweet and elegant. Let me tell you something, I didn't come out on the other side of losing two parents easily! Losing each one of them has been the hardest thing in the world. If I can face and deal with that the best I can, I can deal with almost anything. I am fiercely loyal and protective. Come near those I love, including those with fur and my claws come out and it is not a pretty sight! So if you are not going to aid me in the recovery of my furry family members or support me in my quest, buzz the hell off! I don't need you Mr. Animal Control SHIT HEAD!

Sorry, I know some of you are probably appalled. This blog is not for the faint of heart or those easily offended.

I need my girls back, it's pretty simple!

Mama Out!

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

One thing I forgot to add!

Ping has been saying "Ping's got it" a lot lately. She insists on doing the middle buckle on her car seat every time we get into the car. She always gets it connected and then demands a HIGH 5. It's adorable. The newest thing is "Ping's got it, give me 5 Mama and give each other a mutual kiss." Today was a little different and melted my heart. Today was "Ping's got it, give me 5 Mama, give each other kisses on each cheek and a big smile and a I LOVE YOU MAMA." Thought I was going to freaking cry. If that is not the sweetest thing.

It's been hard for her these past few days. Ping goes outside and says "Sophie, Lily, come back, Sophie, Lily....." It's hard on me, but when she cries out for them, it puts me over the edge. She knows they are outside and Mama is a wreck!


I hope I can share better news soon.

I am just so sad!

Most of you who follow my blog already know this, but for those of you who don't, I will share why I have been a little absent.

Last Friday, my husband opened the windows in our family room. He does this all the time because our 4 furbabies love to sit in the windows. Well 3 of the girls out of our 4 escaped!!!! We were able to get one back within a few hours. 2 are still missing. I am very heartbroken over this. I spent the weekend searching and crying hysterically. My girls are so very important to me. They are our family. Things have not been the same with them not here.

We have tried so many things! We have 5 cages set up. We have tried food everywhere and nowhere. In the cages, outside the cages. We have spread catnip everywhere and have sprayed apple cider vinegar as it dulls human scents. We have tried special sprays that calm cats. We have really tried it all. We have seen the two around. Not daily, but we have seen them. We have tried two rescue each one once now, but have failed at our attempts. So here we are, approaching a week later and they are still outside:(

Today Bill went to the doctors. He has pneumonia! He has not felt great since we returned from China. So he is out of work for the next two days!

I have tried to keep it together this week for Ping's sake, but it's hard. I was okay this afternoon, but started feeling sad and having a lot of anxiety again a few hours ago. I miss them so much. Having a child does not change the fact that I want my girls inside my home safe and sound. These two are feral cats and sisters. They have been together for 3 1/2 or so years. We have had them since they were 9 months old. My mom trapped them and took them to the vets for their shots and to be spayed. I promised my mom I would always take care of the girls. I have failed her and it's pains me to even think about it. It's all I think about though!

I am not a huge prayer person as I am not sure where religion fits into my life, but I have been praying a lot these last few days. Please say your prayers or think good thoughts for us please. I want my girls home. I will be the happiest person in the world if they would return!

Thanks!

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Sweet Pea

Sweet Pea Ping is sleeping:)) YAY. She never naps during the day. She is really tired. She was up with the birds and Baba this morning. She crawled into my lap, slapped her head on my shoulder and passed out. I waited till she started to snore and then put her on the couch. I love snuggling her, but 35lbs of dead weight is a back and neck killer. Plus who can get stuff done with a little one dangling off your neck????

So I took the opportunity to wash the refrigerator out, throw out any old stuff and put everything into neat piles. This annoys Bill. He doesn't understand why I like to "soldier" my food. That is what he calls it. I line everything up like soldiers! I like to know what is in there. So I put all the yogurts together, the juices, the fruit cups, etc. Get my point? Hubby is totally different. He buys 300 different cheeses at the store even though he has three different cheeses already opened in the fridge. Drives me batty. So I just opened all the containers and put them into little cups/containers. I haven't finished, I just needed a foot break. I could go on forever, but my feet can't. Can I have some new feet please? These feet suck! Between the Plantar, heel pain and Lymphedema....they kill. Never mind that I am making them work hard due to my weight. Poor things!!!!! They need a massage:)

The next thing I am going to work on is one of the cabinets in the kitchen. It's next to the bathroom. We keep towels and such in there. I neaten it, Bill wrecks it, I neaten it, Bill wreaks it. Why do I neaten it? I guess so he can wreck it? My next husband is going to be sooooo different. He is going to be a neatnik. He is going to want to jump out of bed and get going at 7am. He will have the lawn mowed, the garage cleaned and the Pingster fed by 10am. I just am not sure how to tell Miss Ping that she is going to get a new Baba? I have a feeling she might fight me on this. Bill will probably too. Drats. I could keep him and maybe magically insert a neat person button? Hmmm, must get back to my lab.

All kidding aside, I do love him. He does read this you know, so for all of you smarties, read between the lines! LOL. He is a good guy. A great dad. He just came with a few issues. Like his family:) God I am dead duck!!!! Kidding sweetie pie!!!

Do you think he will notice the fridge? Nah! How about the end cap cabinet? Nah! God why do we marry these men? Love. Such a silly thing really. Gets the best of us.

Well the little miss is still sleeping, so I best jog off to my next task.

Mama Out!

XO

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Time marches on....

Let me see if I can back up and cover the last couple of days.

Friday, we went to Norwood to attend a rehearsal dinner with our friends Maura and Patrick. We were not in the wedding, but Maura wanted us to attend since I rolled 175 scrolls for the wedding. I offered:) She lives in Arizona now, so I don't see her often:(

Ping was whiny all day and that really isn't like her. I had a feeling something was up. Well as the hours ticked away at the party, I noticed her getting hotter and more lethargic! We were not sure what was going on. At the advice of many, we got her some Motrin at CVS on the way home to our house. I got the chewables. I gave her one. By the time we got home, she was cooler, but clearly she was not herself.

Woke up Saturday early morning and she was at hot as hell. She was just staring at me. I gave her more Motrin and called the doctor. They fit us in. So we rushed off to see the pediatrician as we had a wedding to get ready for an it's an hour from where we live. I don't rush her off every time she gets sick, but she has never had a fever before. The doctor said she had a sore throat. Poor baby. It was not Strep. That I was thankful for. We rushed home, got ready in record time and headed to the wedding. We got there as the first bridesmaid walked down the aisle! SCORE!!!! Stressful, but we did it. The wedding was a full mass. Ping did great. After the vows though, she did yell out as daddy told her not to do something. It's okay, I melted into the floor!!! LOL. Baba took her to the back of the church. She came back shortly after fully recovered!

The reception was next door. That was from 3-9 and then there was an after party. Ping did great at the whole thing, except she passed out at the after party. It was 10pm after all. She seemed to be good with the Motrin, so I was happy. Everyone thought she was adorable and well behaved. Music to my ears. I like to know that others think she is well behaved, it's important to me that she isn't a terror.

Sunday we got up late. We did a bunch of stuff around here and an errand. Bill took Ping to muster practice and then we had dinner with Meri, Joe and Lucas. It was nice to be out with friends for a quiet dinner even though the kids keep the dads hopping!!

Monday, I had an appointment in the afternoon at her preschool. It was only 1/2 hour long. We did a few errands after and came home. Bill had school, so it was double duty day for me!

Yesterday, the two of us did a few errands and then headed to her ear appointment. The tubes are doing well and she is hearing much better. YAY! Afterwards we went home where she and daddy met up and headed out to grocery shop and mom went off for a pedicure:) Not that anyone sees my feet with my Lymphedema, but it's good for my nails to be cut, etc.

Today Ping and I had a 9am appointment, but I cancelled it. We had a 10:30 playgroup, but I decided we wouldn't go. We had an hour long open house at her preschool and also a playgroup this afternoon, so I figured the day was busy enough. The morning playgroup was cancelled anyway. I was glad, because I enjoy that one a lot and the thought of missing it was disappointing! We are home now and Ping is asleep on the couch. Odd for her, but it was a busy day so she must be tired. I wouldn't mind a nappy myself.

Ping has lately been coming up to me, throwing her arms around me and saying "love you mama." Is that not the sweetest thing ever? She is truly a joy. I can not imagine life without her. I want her to be this age forever. No growing up, no getting married, no having kids. None of that growing up nonsense. I just want it to be her and me and Baba (occasionally) and we won't ever age!!!!! Where is the fountain of youth? How about the fountain of skinny? Let me know where both are and I am there with bells on the pedicured toes!!!!!

Well for now I must go. Not the most exciting post, that is for sure. However, I have a bunch of stuff I must do now. Hope to talk more next time!

Mama Out!

XO